Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Dear Kainoa,

I miss you already! When you wake up from your nap tomorrow mommy will be flying on the big airplane. More than anything I wish you & your daddy were coming too. My days are truly better because you are in them...

Your little face reminds me of all I have to be thankful for & to be happy even when milk spills and toys break. Thank you for giving me the courage to be your mom...

Each night you go to bed don't forget to say your prayers. I left 26 dream land tickets next to your bed (one for each day I am gone) so you can still have sweet dreams... I will meet you in dream land every night so we can play at our secret beach together!

You keep smiling every day and know mommy is always thinking about you. If you start to feel sad or miss me just look out to the ocean and know I am just across it looking back towards you!

Drink your juice, eat your veggies, and keep playing as loud as you want! I hid the markers in the closet, tell your dad mommy lets you play with them, then go color all over the walls... and have fun! If it rains jump in puddles. Make sure to play with Auntie Brooke and take Uncle Nick's bike pumps for mommy...
Time will go by faster than we know. Until then enjoy your time with your grandma's and show them lots of love. I trust you to be careful too! They aren't as fast as mommy and might have trouble keeping up with you...and please no riding the little four wheeler down the stairs. As for your dad... kiss him for me everyday and give him a giant hug too! Make sure he takes you to the beach, park, Jamba Juice, and helps you brush your teeth.
Kainoa, thank you for being my son. I do believe every good and perfect gift is from above... you are so perfect to me and I can hardly wait to see you in a few weeks! I promise to bring you back a surprise! Until then, know that not a single breath will pass that I am not thinking of you... you are my shining star in this crazy dark world...

I love you,
mommy

18 comments:

Mel said...

OH BREE..I know the tears are flowing when you wrote this beautiful letter...if it makes you feel any better my tears just landed on my computer and joined yours :) Stay strong!!! Hugs...safe travels!!

TICA MACHA said...

Funny how the worst thing at the worst time in your life can turn into the BEST THING you have ever done in your life, being a mom.
I don't have children but your letter to your son touched my heart and I feel your pain of leaving your loved ones behind.
Be strong like I know you are.
Teri

Pedergraham said...

My tears are falling on top of Mel's. The dream tickets are a wonderful idea
-Danielle

Eileen Swanson said...

Ok, I am the big baby now. This made me cry big time. You are an awesome mom.....see you soon sis, i am on a plan in 8 hours, love ya.....

E

Trigirlpink said...

Oh he is such a CUTIE! I just love the pics! No wonder he's got you wrapped tightly around his finger!
Safe and super fun travels! You'll be home before ya know it!

Lisa said...

What a beautiful letter! Have an amazing trip and train HARD! Look forward to hearing about all of your adventures in Australia.

Marni said...

That was so nice, thoughtful and honest. I'm sure you feel a bit better just getting that out there. You have a wonderful family!

Kellye Mills said...

He's so sweet!! You are a great mother Bree, and he will always appreciate that! Have an amazing, wonderful, safe trip and Keep us updated as to how GREAT Australia is!!

And if need be... you can pack him right up and send him to my house!! My kids would LOVE him!

kelli said...

now i am crying.

Brooke Myers said...

Gosh darn it Bree, why are you making all of us tear up...

Remember what Devony and I said this morning to you - go and enjoy and do not worry -there is no sense in worrying.

Kainoa knows how much you love him Bree and it will be a good bonding for him and Jim and then with the grandmas...

You smile, laugh, and take in the experience while you are there. train with all your heart and go after your dreams with everything you have within you. God prepared the way, now follow after it!!!

Naughty said...

I am teared up too.........the love of a child is incomprehensibly profound I know.........you are a brave, beautiful woman, wife and mother......use the love in your life to be your force...it will carry you. Trust.

Naughty

Kristie said...

Bree I hope your training goes well! I will be praying for you!

Mira Lelovic said...

Oh my, I know I'm emotional, but that really got me. You have to save that for one day when he's old enough to understand. That will probably be one day when he has a child of his own. How many times did my parents tell me, "You won't understand until you have one." They were so right.

Katie Weaver-Jongerius said...

I hope you saved this letter for the future! It's beautiful.

Tears are flowing in Florida and I miss my kids even more now.

Good luck with your trip and training. Kainoa will miss you but when Mommy is happy, EVERYONE is happy.

Be safe, chase your dream....Kainoa will be happy when his Mommy returns!

Emmalee said...

auntie brooke has some big shoes to fill while you're gone. But don't worry she is quite worthy of the task. Good luck down under! (or over for you I guess)

Jen in Budapest said...

thanks for sharing your life....why do you gotta go and make us cry? I pray your family gets stronger throughout the time apart. All love, Jen

triclancy said...

I am tearing up big time here. Everytime I have to travel for work, I feel like i leave my heart on the ground with Caden (my son). It never gets easier, but it does do them good to see that other people can take care of them and love them when Mommy cannot be there. He will miss you, but it will be all the sweeter when you return! Best of luck in Oz!!

jessica rae kirkwood said...

Wee one,

Man I love your blog. I love how its not as much about training or racing, its more of a journal of your thoughts and feelings that everyone reading can relate to. Sometimes I like reading what your friends write and their views and reactions to your words. Love love love it.

Have a wonderful time in Australia. You will be a world champion I know it. Tell all those ladies I say hello. I'm going to 'race' in lavaman in a few weeks. Fun times. I'm mostly excited to watch your bum the entire time, even though by the sounds of it its a bit smaller. I'm sure it will be just as beautiful.

Enough about your bum. Keep up the blogging and give those girls AND Paul a big hug for me.

See you soon,
Jess